(you can watch the video version below if you prefer)
Death doulas must be mindful of various aspects of the actual vigil time, which for our purposes is the last 3 days of life. You must adjust your service to the type of healthcare
setting the family is within as well as if they are on hospice or not.
You must tune in expertly to what support systems are lacking and how you can bridge them and how you can be a helpful liaison between agencies. You also need to be skilled at what is needed within the family, at the bedside, all the while being that “hollow bone” in the situation, where all flows through, with none of your “issues” projecting into the situation.
Remember, this is the last time they are going to see their loved one; know from deep in your bones that you're holding space for a time period that they will remember the rest of their lives.
This is the role of the skilled end-of-life doula. This is no small feat. People are depending on you for guidance, for support, for hearing what they need and helping behind the scenes. You need to be deeply supportive so they can be there with their loved one. In the video learning, you will see all the ways you must be aware and how you will be most helpful.
This is an ongoing study and an ongoing skillset that you will develop as you practice. Be gentle with yourself as you build your awareness and skills and remain vigilant. It DOES matter that you are knowledgeable about what should be happening but you do not have to know ALL the solutions, just be able to find resources and support where you need it for the family and yourself.
All my love and confidence in you!